Donny's Ramblings

Let Her Speak For Herself

14 Comments

I just received this as a comment on my post about The Game. I feel it deserves it’s own blog entry.

Donny,

I am a former model for you, I do not want to use my name because of what I experienced with that, but I did want to comment. I have been reading your blog for a few months, and I am very impressed. I’ll admit, I was shocked at first just because I stumbled upon your blog and was like “whoa”.

I found this post exceptionally personal, to me at least, because if you remember my “finding out” involved some very damaging events involving my boyfriend, and some friends of his. Like so many other young women, it made my life a living hell. And like I’m sure you realize now, most women posing for you were already going through a personal hell that had brought them there.

I am very sorry for what you are going through, in a way, I’ve been there. It seems almost ironic that 2 years ago you were telling me that my boyfriend should be more open-minded and concilatory to me posing.

What I learned from the experience was that it made me a stronger individual, and I hope (as it seems it has) that it does the same for you. Even then, I knew you were an extremely GOOD person, something I could never explain to anyone else adequately when asked, but I myself knew to be true.

God Bless,

J

—–

J,

Thank you for your grace. There are many models I’d like to look in the face and tell them I’m sorry. I want them to see that I mean it. If you run across any other girls who’ve modeled for me please tell them to read my blog and to contact me via email if they’re willing to do so. I want to apologize to them.

And to you, I am so sorry for what you went through. I can’t express in words how truly sorry I am. I wish I’d have felt your pain on a deeper level as it happened, because if I really deeply understood I’d have stopped long ago. All I can really say is that I was in a different place back then.

Honestly, I don’t know how to make up for it. I ask myself that question from time to time and as of yet don’t have an answer.

Again, thank you for your grace and for saying that you felt I was still a good person. I really appreciate that. I would like to make a promise to you and to the other girls that I’ll spend the rest of my life doing whatever I reasonably can do to keep others from having to go through what you went through.

– Donny –

14 thoughts on “Let Her Speak For Herself

  1. Going deeper…into that new heart…ownership and remorse…let it keep flowing…we love ya’, Donny… D&R

  2. Going deeper…into that new heart…ownership and remorse…let it keep flowing…we love ya’, Donny… D&R

  3. Keep it up, man. You’re inspiring people you don’t even know about by showing how empty the world of porn is, and at the same time offering hope to those who are trying to escape it. Thanks dude…

  4. Keep it up, man. You’re inspiring people you don’t even know about by showing how empty the world of porn is, and at the same time offering hope to those who are trying to escape it. Thanks dude…

  5. Dear Donny,I think the answer to your quest to find a way to pay back or give back to all those girls and all the others, is found in your last paragraph.Doing all you can to help in bringing life, hope, redeption…Christ to all those ladies. The scriptures say, that if He be lifted up, He will draw all men…and women unto Him. Grow in Him. Let Christ be lifted up in your life and you will be bringing light into those dark places in their lives. You are not the light, but letting the Light that comes from Him shine through you, will be the “payback” in His love and of course, a request for forgiveness for being a part of that past in their lives. That’s love. His love. They won’t know what to do with it, as they don’t know what to do with Him. But that’s okay. They need His love more than anything and no man can do that for them, especially in their pain. But His love can…and then they are in God’s hand to experience His love, forgiveness, healing and redemption. That’s all you can do for them. Give them His love and let Him work things out in their lives. “This man came to witness, that he might testify of the Light, that all men might believe in it [adhere to it, trust it, and rely upon it] through him. He was not the Light himself, but came that he might bear witness regarding the Light. There it was–the true Light [was then] coming into the world [the genuine, perfect, steadfast Light] that illumines every person. He came into the world, and though the world was made through Him, the world did not recognize Him [did not know Him]. He came to that which belonged to Him [to His own–His domain, creation, things, world], and they who were His own did not receive Him and did not welcome Him. But to as many as did receive and welcome Him, He gave the authority (power, privilege, right) to become the children of God, that is, to those who believe in (adhere to, trust in, and rely on) His name–“John 1:7-12 Amplified BibleGod bless you brother.Danny

  6. Dear Donny,
    I think the answer to your quest to find a way to pay back or give back to all those girls and all the others, is found in your last paragraph.
    Doing all you can to help in bringing life, hope, redeption…Christ to all those ladies. The scriptures say, that if He be lifted up, He will draw all men…and women unto Him. Grow in Him. Let Christ be lifted up in your life and you will be bringing light into those dark places in their lives. You are not the light, but letting the Light that comes from Him shine through you, will be the “payback” in His love and of course, a request for forgiveness for being a part of that past in their lives. That’s love. His love. They won’t know what to do with it, as they don’t know what to do with Him. But that’s okay. They need His love more than anything and no man can do that for them, especially in their pain. But His love can…and then they are in God’s hand to experience His love, forgiveness, healing and redemption. That’s all you can do for them. Give them His love and let Him work things out in their lives.
    “This man came to witness, that he might testify of the Light, that all men might believe in it [adhere to it, trust it, and rely upon it] through him.

    He was not the Light himself, but came that he might bear witness regarding the Light.

    There it was–the true Light [was then] coming into the world [the genuine, perfect, steadfast Light] that illumines every person.

    He came into the world, and though the world was made through Him, the world did not recognize Him [did not know Him].

    He came to that which belonged to Him [to His own–His domain, creation, things, world], and they who were His own did not receive Him and did not welcome Him.

    But to as many as did receive and welcome Him, He gave the authority (power, privilege, right) to become the children of God, that is, to those who believe in (adhere to, trust in, and rely on) His name–“
    John 1:7-12 Amplified Bible

    God bless you brother.
    Danny

  7. This is such a touching post. Thanks for sharing.

  8. This is such a touching post. Thanks for sharing.

  9. Donny: That’s a good heart man. The Lord is really developing in you a heart that loves as He loves and eyes that see women as He sees them. He has some great plans for you man. God bless you brother.Danny: Great comment sir. I know it was intended for Donny, but I just wanted you to know that it really spoke to my heart as well. May God bless you and continue to give you wisdom. Love and peace bro.

  10. Donny: That’s a good heart man. The Lord is really developing in you a heart that loves as He loves and eyes that see women as He sees them. He has some great plans for you man. God bless you brother.

    Danny: Great comment sir. I know it was intended for Donny, but I just wanted you to know that it really spoke to my heart as well. May God bless you and continue to give you wisdom. Love and peace bro.

  11. Everything I have read from you is very touching and heartfelt. You seem to really feel bad for these women in the industry wholeheartedly. But can I ask this…and please correct me if I am wrong. But no one held a gun to their head and made them choose the life of porn. No one forced them to stay and continue to take the abuse. They could have chosen to become a secretary or a nurse, anything other than porn. Something made them make the choice to make the decision to be a porn star. First they should have done their homework about the pros and cons of porn before getting involved instead of going in blind headfirst! And if they really did research it before getting involved, than how can you feel bad for someone that knew exactly what they were getting involved with to a certain degree. Everyone watches porn too…so even by just the movies you can see that it can be painful and tiring. Behind the scenes stuff like the freeze poses and stuff like that probably is very hard on the body. But again….they knew what they were getting into. Its almost like knowing you are about to marry a physically abusive husband, but then later on down the road crying the blues because he beats you. Maybe I am wrong, but there is a lot of info on the internet that could tell them the pros and cons before getting involved. So I honestly cant feel sorry for them. I’m sorry to say it, but thats my opinion.

  12. Everything I have read from you is very touching and heartfelt. You seem to really feel bad for these women in the industry wholeheartedly. But can I ask this…and please correct me if I am wrong. But no one held a gun to their head and made them choose the life of porn. No one forced them to stay and continue to take the abuse. They could have chosen to become a secretary or a nurse, anything other than porn. Something made them make the choice to make the decision to be a porn star. First they should have done their homework about the pros and cons of porn before getting involved instead of going in blind headfirst! And if they really did research it before getting involved, than how can you feel bad for someone that knew exactly what they were getting involved with to a certain degree. Everyone watches porn too…so even by just the movies you can see that it can be painful and tiring. Behind the scenes stuff like the freeze poses and stuff like that probably is very hard on the body. But again….they knew what they were getting into. Its almost like knowing you are about to marry a physically abusive husband, but then later on down the road crying the blues because he beats you. Maybe I am wrong, but there is a lot of info on the internet that could tell them the pros and cons before getting involved. So I honestly cant feel sorry for them. I’m sorry to say it, but thats my opinion.

  13. Gianna, are you making the libertarian’s mistake of thinking that every person makes a free fully informed decision on every issue.
    Have you ever wonderend is many of the women who go into the industry have some form of mental problems and serious self esteem issues? Have you realized that the woman who marries a abusive husband might have been condicioned to do so by her childhood? Do some research on the mindset of sex industry workers and you will find vulnerable women, with abusive childhoods, low self esteem to the point of self loathing, many with substance abuse problems, mostly poor, emotionally inmature and unstable. Those women are not in the best condition for making rational choices. BTW, the more I study the new develpments in genetics and neurology, the less I believe in free will. The cards on those women were thrown against them long ago before they choose to pose in front of a camera. But that doesnt mean that you should shot the coup of grace as pornographers do. A decent person should help them get out of their holes, not put them into a bigger hole.
    And believe, not everyones watches porn. Many of the girls who act in porn films have never seen one. Not even her own movies!

  14. Gianna, are you making the libertarian’s mistake of thinking that every person makes a free fully informed decision on every issue.
    Have you ever wonderend is many of the women who go into the industry have some form of mental problems and serious self esteem issues? Have you realized that the woman who marries a abusive husband might have been condicioned to do so by her childhood? Do some research on the mindset of sex industry workers and you will find vulnerable women, with abusive childhoods, low self esteem to the point of self loathing, many with substance abuse problems, mostly poor, emotionally inmature and unstable. Those women are not in the best condition for making rational choices. BTW, the more I study the new develpments in genetics and neurology, the less I believe in free will. The cards on those women were thrown against them long ago before they choose to pose in front of a camera. But that doesnt mean that you should shot the coup of grace as pornographers do. A decent person should help them get out of their holes, not put them into a bigger hole.
    And believe, not everyones watches porn. Many of the girls who act in porn films have never seen one. Not even her own movies!

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