Donny's Ramblings


The Seduction of Barack Obama

We all just wanna be big rock stars, and live in hilltop mansions drivin’ fifteen cars.


When I was producing pornography I had several means of recruiting…  I’d pay existing models for referrals.  I’d hand out business cards to girls I met in public.  I’d run ads in local newspapers:

MODELS NEEDED! Ages 18 & Up.  $500 per day. (Phone number). (Website address).

Nudity wasn’t mentioned.  Why not?  Because the girls I wanted wouldn’t respond if it was.  I specialized in first time, never before seen, girl next door types.

If I answered the phone when a prospective model called I knew exactly how to handle the conversation.  I guided her through it like a champ.  I’m not going to go into detail, but will instead leave it at this:  I addressed her concerns before she had a chance to voice them herself.  Why?  Because by doing so it felt as if I understood her.  It made me seem more “safe”.  Some of the things I said made it feel okay to just “go check things out” without obligation.

“I understand” is very powerful.  Identifying with someone goes a long way.

Once she arrived for her interview, I let the location do the selling: things were laid out in a very appealing manner.  A lifestyle was portrayed, and potential models painted themselves into it without much effort on my part.  “Porn can give me this?”

The unspoken reply?  “Yeah, baby, it can.”

Seduction is the process of deliberately enticing a person to engage in some sort of behavior. Nearly all of us like to be seduced in some way.

My style of recruiting was total seduction.  Which leads me to Barack Obama…


Barack Obama is a master of seduction.  He draws us in.  He paints a picture for us… a picture we want to become a part of… and he sells that picture exceptionally well.

I want to believe that Barack Obama is faster than a speeding bullet, more powerful than a locomotive, and able to leap tall buildings with a single bound.

My gut tells me to vote for John McCain, but I want to be seduced.

Much can be accomplished by a Rock Star President, loved by countries around the world, who is the exact opposite of the boring 72 year old career politician he is running against.

As I learned in the adult world, if you make people FEEL good, they’ll do things they’ve never before considered.  And they’ll do it with a smile.


Abortion is a big deal to me, but as one of my favorite Christian authors, Donald Miller, wrote on his blog early this morning, abortions decreased by 18% under Pro-Choice Bill Clinton.  I’d like to think the same type of results can happen with an Obama Presidency, because he has a plan in mind to reduce unwanted pregnancies.

Growing the economy from the ground up sounds very good to me.  When Barack Obama says the economy will grow when the poor have more money to buy the products marketed by the rich, I’d like to think he’s right.

I’d like to think Barack Obama is the right man for the job.

I like being seduced.

Do I go with my gut feeling, or do I vote for the hope of change?


Tonight I sat down and marked my sample ballot with every choice I’ll be making tomorrow morning when I arrive at my polling place.

I’ve marked off the “yes” position beside Prop 2 because I think farm animals deserve the right to be able to turn around in their cages.

I’ve marked off the “yes” position beside Prop 8 because, while I have no objections to homosexual couples receiving visitation rights with sick partners and all the other legal benefits afforded married heterosexuals, I DO NOT think it’s fair, for instance, to ask the Boy Scouts to admit Girls into their club, and to bully them into doing so by throwing around words like “equality for all”.  Let them start their OWN club.  Let “marriage” remain between one man and one woman.  Like the Girl Scouts, “equality” can still be enjoyed even if the new club has a different name.

I’ve placed my mark of choice beside every proposition, beside the name of the man I’d like to have serve as my US Congressman, beside the name of the man I’d like to see as my State Assemblyman, and beside the names of those I’d like to see on my city council.

I’ve also marked off a position beside one of the two major candidates for President of the United States of America, and I’m at peace with my decision.

But I’m not telling you who I ultimately chose.



Is God a Baby Killer?

A few weeks ago I watched John McCain on The View, where he stated that he believes Roe v. Wade is a flawed decision that must be overturned. On this, I agree with John McCain.  Too bad he has little power to do anything about it.  In another interview he publicly stated that, if President, the Justices he’d nominate to the Supreme Court would NOT have to pass a litmus test in regards to their opinions on abortion.  In other words… business as usual.

18 hours ago I received an email from a woman who attends the same church I attend. She wrote, “I will be so bold as to say that anyone who calls themself a Christian should not be ABLE to cast a vote for a baby killer.”

She is, of course, referring to Barack Obama, who is Pro-Choice.

Abortion is an important topic in our country, and one on which most people have strong emotions one way or another.  My position is clear:  I hate abortion.  I don’t think a woman should be allowed to kill her unborn baby and not face the same consequences any other murderer faces.  And when it boils down to it, that’s exactly what Roe v Wade does:  removes the threat of earthly consequences from the Doctors who perform abortions and the women who CHOOSE to have them.

But, dear Christian, does the legality of abortion make it a viable option for you?  No?  Why not?  Could it possibly be because one’s “choice” is actually a condition of the heart? The ONLY way to rid this country of abortion is to change hearts!  No law will ever change a person’s heart.

Since he is not a Medical Doctor, I think it’s a safe bet to say that Barack Obama has never performed an abortion.

Unless he’s a freak of nature, I think it’s a safe bet to say that Barack Obama has never personally had an abortion, either.

But if Barack Obama is a “baby killer” because he espouses a belief that a pregnant woman should be allowed to make the decision as to whether or not she’ll terminate her pregnancy, if THAT is the criteria to make one a “baby killer”, then perhaps we should consider this question as well:

Is GOD HIMSELF a baby killer?

After all, God gave each of us free will to make choices in our lives, choices which ultimately lead to death, didn’t He?  And millions, perhaps billions, have made those choices, haven’t they?  So does allowing choice make God Himself a murderer?

I’d imagine that all who proclaim a belief in God are also convinced that He has the last word.  He makes the final judgment.  Those who make the decision to murder their children might escape punishment here on earth, but He dishes out eternal consequences.

Senator Obama is not responsible for the choices of pregnant women or the Doctors who perform abortions.  With my own ears I’ve heard him state the opinion that he personally detests the thought of abortion, but believes each woman has the right to make such a choice.  He may favor giving a “pass” from earthly consequences, but Barack Obama is not a baby killer any more than God is a baby killer.  In His infinite power, God could quite easily intercede and stop abortion, or murder, or rape… or any other man made, sin inspired malady.  But He doesn’t.  He allows us to make our choices, yet wishes us to know that there are consequences for our decisions.

There is also redemption available, isn’t there?  There is a cure for the heart condition that leads to a person being capable of ending the life of the innocent.  The final payment for our sins is eternal death.  We can make payment in person, or we can allow God Himself to pay it for us.  The choice is ours.  He’s opened an account in our name for the exact amount owed by each and every one of us for the sins we’ve committed…  sins that have the exact same result as that of a woman or doctor ending a child’s life:  eternal separation from the Creator of the Universe.  The payment in that account can be claimed by any person at any time in any place simply by CHOOSING to say, “I’ll take it!  Thank you SO MUCH!”.

When God made a personal appearance, in the flesh, right here on this earth He asked those of us who have accepted that payment to become His doctors,  offering the cure for this world’s bad heart condition to others.  It seems to me that sometimes we don’t see the bigger picture.  Some of us would rather scream at the young mother walking into an abortion clinic than to embrace her, tell her about the CURE, and offer to help her take care of the child in her womb. Others might think it’s a better use of our time to accuse a man like Senator Obama of being a baby killer based on his opinion that earthly consequences should be removed for those who make this very bad choice.

It’s much easier for us to sit around and complain about HIS opinion than to get out and make an effort to change hearts, isn’t it?  We’d rather sit around talking about who will outlaw what, ignoring more than 3 decades of history that shows no politician is going to do anything to overturn a “flawed decision”, than getting out our doctor bags and making house calls.

I hate that “choice” just as much as anyone.  I also despise the idea of capital punishment because I don’t think it’s any man’s place to decide when any other person’s time to choose Eternal Life should run out.  My stomach turns at the choice that has lead to the killing of more than 100,000 innocent Iraqi women and children under the guise of “stopping terror.”

I read one of those email forwards going around in which the following was stated:  “I’m voting Republican because Saddam was a good guy when Reagan armed him, a bad guy when Bush’s daddy made war on him, a good guy when Cheney did business with him and a bad guy when Bush Junior needed a ‘we can’t find Bin Laden’ diversion.” Although the intent of the original writer is clear, there’s a good point hidden inside that sentence… there is NO innocence in this election…  neither candidate running for President is innocent.  Barack Obama advocates allowing women to make the choice to end innocent life, yet John McCain supported the decision to ORDER our military personnel to end innocent life.

(that same email also stated, “I’m voting Republican because trade with Cuba is wrong because the country is communist, but trade with China and Vietnam is vital to a spirit of international harmony” but that’s a whole other topic…  one can find hypocrisy wherever he looks)

In wrestling with my decision on which of these two men I’ll be casting my vote for I can’t help but think, “If he was a bit younger, I’d write in Billy Graham (who happens to be a lifelong Democrat by the way) as my choice for President.”  Under his watch, more than 2.5 million hearts from around the world have been united with the cure for what ails ’em.  But since Reverend Graham is more interested in promoting Christ than politics, I doubt he’d accept the position even if it was offered.

When we make ignorant statements like the one that prompted this post we don’t do God any favors.  It’s okay to disagree with Senator Obama in regards to his opinions on abortion.  It’s okay to disagree with Senator McCain’s support of a deceptive decision to go to war.  But I think it’s divisive to bully others into voting our way by calling candidates “baby killers” (or “terrorists”).

Can we instead maintain civil discussion, vote our conscience, leave the “conscience” of others between them and God, and decide to unite as one body in our efforts to offer the cure to our country’s heart condition?  Is that too much to ask?

After all, healed hearts make issues like abortion… moot.

Please take the time to read this article, written by best selling Christian author Donald Miller and published today on his blog.


I Haven't Attempted to Vote Early Because…

…I’m still looking for a reason to change my mind.

California will undoubtedly go to Obama, but my vote is important to me. I’ve been searching myself to try to discover whether or not I favor Obama out of rebellion. If you’ve read this blog for any length of time you’ve heard of the bitterness I’ve held in the past against the Church. I still fight it. I’m wondering if I still see things through those glasses. Am I leaning away from the Republican Party because it is the Party favored by the religious?

God, grant me clarity. I’m confident you love both of the men running for President. I’m confident you want us to exercise our free will and vote for the one we like best. But I’m also sure you can see outside of time and know which man’s actions will best lead this country to a better place. At the moment I feel that man is Barack Obama, but with just a week to go I can’t help but question myself. I need peace. I am asking you for guidance.


If you didn’t see the half hour political advertisement Obama had aired on TV tonight, here it is:


I Haven’t Attempted to Vote Early Because…

…I’m still looking for a reason to change my mind.

California will undoubtedly go to Obama, but my vote is important to me. I’ve been searching myself to try to discover whether or not I favor Obama out of rebellion. If you’ve read this blog for any length of time you’ve heard of the bitterness I’ve held in the past against the Church. I still fight it. I’m wondering if I still see things through those glasses. Am I leaning away from the Republican Party because it is the Party favored by the religious?

God, grant me clarity. I’m confident you love both of the men running for President. I’m confident you want us to exercise our free will and vote for the one we like best. But I’m also sure you can see outside of time and know which man’s actions will best lead this country to a better place. At the moment I feel that man is Barack Obama, but with just a week to go I can’t help but question myself. I need peace. I am asking you for guidance.


If you didn’t see the half hour political advertisement Obama had aired on TV tonight, here it is:


They Have a Sense of Humor: Obama and McCain Roast Each Other (HILARIOUS!)

Flying home from Minot, North Dakota, I have a three hour layover in Minneapolis. I heard about this Al Smith Dinner where McCain and Obama take turns roasting each other so I just HAD to see it. I put on my Bose headset and started watching in the corner of a restaurant inside the airport. I laughed so hard other people walked up to me asking what was so funny. My goodness, people, these two men have a sense of humor, I tell ya! You have GOT to watch these videos!!!

McCain at the Al Smith Dinner:

Obama Roasts McCain at Al Smith Dinner:


Living Alone, Watching McCain / Palin on Fox News

Several months ago I moved into a 3 bedroom 2 bath house in what I consider one of the best neighborhoods in Redding, California.  I’m renting, of course, because my credit will likely not allow me to buy for quite some time.  If you’re new here, I’ll briefly explain why:  when I left the porn business it was impossible to afford the things to which I’d financially obligated myself while making porn money.  Foreclosure, repossession of vehicles and the like now cloud my credit report.

Bad credit is not something that bothers me too much.  Life at peace with God cannot be compared.

This house is near the Sacramento River Trail, which I think of as my personal trail of healing ’cause God and I walk it together each day.  We have some really great conversations.

The original plan was to have my brother and mother live with me, which is why I chose a 3bd/2ba house, but after 6 days they left for San Diego and haven’t returned.  I’ve let them both know that I really like living alone and prefer to keep it this way.

Never being that much into television, I didn’t bother setting up cable or satellite.  In the months I’ve been in this house I’ve had just one channel:  the local ABC station, which almost comes in clearly.    I haven’t missed TV at all.  If I want to watch an NFL football game badly enough I know I can head down to the local Sport’s bar.  When I’ve wanted to catch a Presidential or VP debate I just point my car down the yellow-brick-road to John’s house, or simply catch it on the Internet.  Once in awhile I’ll want to watch CSI, but television isn’t necessary for that because nearly every episode is available online. has quite a few shows and movies available as well.  The Internet is a great source for print news from all around this wide world, and with a broadband connection there is unlimited access to the best of video news as well.  No TV needed there.

One great benefit of not having the distraction of television is the time I am able to put into reading and study.  This is a habit that started early in my life, as my parent’s didn’t allow a television in the house for many years.  During those legalistic times it was seen as a tool of the devil, after all.

But just a few weeks ago my mother informed me that she plans to return soon, and needs to stay here a month or so until an apartment is ready in the area of town she’d like to inhabit.  Mom no longer feels the way she did when I was a child.  Now she really likes television.  A flyer from a Dish Network contractor just happened to appear in my mailbox this past Monday with a great deal on installation for new customers, so  I picked up the phone and placed an order.

My friend David the Die-hard Republican is a Fox News type of guy.  He truly believes their slogan. You know… that they’re Fair and Balanced.  I often rib him about his Fox habit.

When the technician arrived earlier this morning I sent off an email to David.  The subject line was “Fox News” and the message body simply read, “…is just moments away!  The technician is installing my service right now.”

David’s Reply:  “Great Scott!  Your eyes shall soon be opened!   <g> “

Donny:  “Will I be sitting awestruck and unable to move?”

The banter went back and forth, but I have kept my promise to David:  Fox News is on right now, showing McCain and Palin live at a town hall meeting.

Will the lame walk, the deaf hear… my blind eyes see?

They’ll report.  I’ll decide. 🙂


Thoughts on Barack Obama and His Qualifications

I enjoyed last night’s debate.  I like both candidates.  I believe both men have our nation’s best interests at heart, but have different plans on how we get to where we need to be.

However, both on this board and in private email conversations I’ve been asked about Barack Obama’s qualifications.  I’ve posted about most of this in comments, but decided to make a separate blog entry for it.  So here goes… a few thoughts on Barack Obama’s resume:

  • Some make fun of the whole “community organizer” thing, yet fail to mention that his days as a “community organizer” were in the late 80s. That’s not a bad place for a young 20-something year old man to start.
  • Obama’s undergraduate degree comes from Columbia University and his graduate degree from Harvard Law School. Ivy league, baby!
  • He taught Constitutional Law at the University of Chicago Law School for 12 years.
  • He worked for a 12-attorney law firm specializing in civil rights litigation and neighborhood economic development for 11 years.
  • Even from his 20s, Obama’s goal was to work in Politics. He’s been preparing for this job most of his life.
  • He was a state Senator for almost 8 years.
  • He has been a US Senator for almost 4 years now, where he’s held assignments on the Senate Committees for Foreign Relations, Environment and Public Works and Veterans’ Affairs.

As we all know, a President’s term is highly influenced by his advisers.  I think Ivy-League educated Professor Obama has the intelligence to put together a great team, and I am confident he will do a good job running this country.


Another objection that has been raised by more than one reader goes something like this:  “Don’t be gullible! Sure, Obama talks well, but actions speak louder than words!  He’ll never do the things he’s saying he’ll do!”

If you’re of such opinions, yet voted for George W. Bush, I ask that you watch this video of our sitting President, consisting of his “words” that were spoken during the 2000 campaign vs. Al Gore (compare these “words” with his “actions” as President):

As John McCain has voted with this “Dubya” more than 90% of the time, why am I asked to take John at his word, but not to extend the same courtesy to Barack?


Another subject frequently brought up when discussing Barack Obama is his former pastor, Jeremiah Wright.  As I wrote in a recent comment in regards to Mr. Wright’s sermons:

I can’t say that Jeremiah Wright’s message is all the unique. How many services have you attended over the years where Pastors have warned that God will damn America for this sin or that sin? Yet when Jeremiah Wright passionately says, “God Damn America!” we think he’s unpatriotic or, even worse, a threat to our country? I’ve never thought such things about the Pastors *I* heard preach similar messages.

When Pastor Wright compares some of the atrocities our own country has committed while discussing the horrors we experienced on September 11th, I’m not pushed out of shape simply because he more passionately says some of the same things other Pastors have said numerous times.  And I’m certainly not going to project his opinions on Barack Obama.  I’ve had conversations with a man who has attended Pastor Wright’s church and cannot recall hearing “inflammatory” sermons.  I’m sure they were the exception, rather than the rule, but those exceptions sure come in handy when we’re trying to lambast a candidate for attending a “radical” church, don’t they?


As for Bill Ayres… Ayres was an angry hippie college student that got caught up in the emotions of the Sixties and went way too far.   I would never excuse his actions, but I can’t help but notice that he’s now a Distinguished Professor at the University of Chicago and a respected member of society.  He never went to jail for his crimes (what do you think of that?).  By the way, Barack Obama was only 8 years old when all the nasty stuff went down, yet he should be held in contempt for being acquainted with a fellow University of Chicago Professor?  Give me a break!


And where are Obama’s detractors when it comes to John McCain’s involvement with Charles Keating?  If you’re going to sling mud about Barack, why ignore McCain’s short comings?  Heck, today there are news stories questioning McCain’s link to the Iran-Contra ordeal.  What about his cheating on and ultimately leaving the wife who waited for him to come back home from Vietnam?  Why go silent on such, yet so vocally scream about his opponent?


The point is that there is always mud to sling.  It’s hypocritical to justify slinging it at one candidate, yet not being willing to look at the other with the same level of “objectivity”, don’t you think?  I think it’s absurd to justify one candidate’s shortcomings yet trumpet accusations against the other.  If yer gonna sling it, cover both sides with an equal amount of dirt.


Who do you think won the debate last night?  I’m surprisingly picking Obama.  🙂  If you missed it, here it is in full:


ADDED 10/9/08:  Down in the comments area you’ll notice a perfect example of the paragraph above where I wrote about slinging dirt only at one side.  What’s happening here brings to my mind all past elections sitting in conservative churches:  the Democratic candidate is the devil, and the Republican candidate is our only hope as a country.  I want to hear a person being just as vicious with both sides, and then I’ll open my mind to what they have to say.  One – sided attack fests just make me put up a wall and stop listening.