Since the last update (April 11th) things have taken a significant turn for the better.
After my release, I enrolled in classes. The CSU system didn’t recognize the accreditation of one of the schools I attended earlier in life, so I basically had to start all over. I’ve since obtained two degrees, and will begin an MBA program this fall. I did really well: I started at the community college level, from which I transferred with a 4.0 to the California State University (CSU) system. My grades were nearly as good at the CSU level (I had a few Bs – grrrr). One week from today, I start an 18-week continuing education program through UC Davis in a program directly related to my career field. Academics and I are really good friends and I look forward to all of this.
My desire to read the Bible has returned! Hooray! I kept begging God for that to happen, and it has. I am so excited to be able to share this. I have over 3,800 books in my Logos.com Bible study library at the moment. Included in that count are numerous commentaries that I’ve never completely read. In a conversation years ago, Bill Giovannetti told me that his suggested approach to commentaries is to buy them one at a time and read them from cover-to-cover before buying the next. Like many of the things Bill has suggested to me, I didn’t do it that way. But that’s changing now. I love the Anchor-Yale Bible commentary series (which includes their own translation of the book being studied). I’ve begun with Genesis. Let’s see how long it takes me to get through all 454 pages. It’s meaty, and shouldn’t be read at the speed I’d read if doing so for pleasure.
Last week I helped my mother and step-father move to Arkansas from northern California. They drove their motor coach, pulling one of their vehicles. I followed in a pickup. The trip took 4 days in total, more than half of which was in the deserts of Nevada, Utah and Wyoming. Driving through the desert, I had long conversations with God. That was incredible. I feel spiritually refreshed.
I recently had to cut someone from my life who I love very much. The details are too painful to share. But I’ll say this: the experience has cause me to better understand why some have had to cut me out of their lives. It hasn’t been an easy thing for me to do, but it had to be done. I’m sure others feel the same way about me.
I’ve also been seeing both a counselor (which I’ve done from the beginning of my release) as well as a psychiatrist (a recent development). I’ve tried a few prescription drugs: Buspar, followed by Zoloft. I didn’t like the way Buspar made me feel. Zoloft has been fine so far. I’ve never previously been prescribed such drugs, and I’m really not sure how I feel about it yet. But I’m willing to try anything to help better myself. I’m also getting a lot of exercise. Yesterday, for example, I took a 31-mile bike ride along the shores of Lake Tahoe. Exercise is definitely good for my mental outlook.
I spend a lot of time sitting in peace and quiet in my home. It’s a sanctuary for me. I turn on classical music in the background, lightly playing, and immerse myself in work or study.
I really want a dog. My Mastiffs passed away, and my heart hasn’t been ready to replace them. I did quite a bit of dog sitting for others, but now I feel as if I’m finally ready to get another dog of my own. There’s nothing more loyal than a dog.
Not many read what I write anymore, but for those who do: I am happy to be able to give a positive update for once. Now back to Genesis…